I have never felt more exhausted than during pregnancy. Although I’m someone who can struggle with energy at the best of time (which is why I started exploring how to have more energy for life!), the level of exhaustion I’ve felt over the last few months has been on another level. I’m bone tired, unable to concentrate and quite often feel like my eyes are being held open with matchsticks. It’s like nothing I’ve experienced before.

Of course, being the person that I am I wanted to understand more about why i feel so tired. This is what I found out…

According to the NHS it is totally normal to feel tired (or even exhausted) during pregnancy, especially in the first 12 weeks when your body is working in overdrive getting set up to create the nest for your baby to grow and develop in. Given the amount that’s going on it’s really not surprising the first trimester is SO tiring, this is what your body’s up to at that time:

• building the placenta - during the first trimester your body is growing a whole new (and frankly amazing) organ just to supply your baby with the nutrients and oxygen it needs to grow and develop into a little person. This is a monumental task, and as with all monumental tasks it totally saps your energy.

• pregnancy hormones - my hormones went wild during my first trimester and I really struggled as my body started producing more progesterone which in turn had an impact on my mood, and let me tell you that riding the emotional rollercoaster that is pregnancy is exhausting.

• extra demands on your body - during pregnancy your blood volume increases by up to 50%, your heart rate increases, your metabolism is higher, your blood pressure and blood sugar are lower and your body is using more nutrients and water. Together all these changes are a lot for your body to keep up with and that can be exhausting.

While many women find their energy increases in the second trimester thanks to their hormones settling down and their bodies finishing up the massive task of growing the placenta, the third trimester (from around week 28 onwards) is another hotspot for fatigue:

• the discomfort of a growing bump - baby bumps are uncomfortable. They make it difficult to sleep, are heavy and can put pressure on the rest of the body leaving you with a sore back, sore hips and sore everything. Managing that discomfort is physically and psychologically exhausting, and that’s before you have to deal with everything else that’s going on in life.

• sleepless nights - between the discomfort of your growing belly, pregnancy insomnia, learning to sleep on your side and needing to pee every five minutes, sleep doesn’t always come easily when you’re pregnant, no matter how tired you are.

• the stress of a big life change - being pregnant is a huge life change, it is physically and mentally demanding and that is going to leave you drained even before you start thinking about all the changes that come with having a baby! Just a few days ago Mike and I were talking about just how many decisions we’ve had to make over the last few months, big things like which diagnostics to have, financial decisions and a whole load of other questions that come with pregnancy and parenthood. It is overwhelming and exhausting thinking about it all.

• getting on with life - I know I’ve found normal life 10 times harder since becoming pregnant. There’s more admin thanks to hospital paperwork, I find sitting for long periods of time uncomfortable which is affecting my work and my mind can turn to mush over simple things (I recently forgot what a fire alarm was called…). Everything just seems to take more energy every day and that really adds to my pregnancy fatigue more generally.

Stress, Rest and Awareness

All of these factors are stressful for our minds and our bodies to deal with. We don’t have an unlimited capacity for stress, which is why we get tired. When we’re under more stress than usual (for example, during pregnancy) it’s normal that we’re going to get more tired as a result of that stress because we need more rest to manage it effectively.

There’s an equation that is central to all the work I do (and how I live my life) - stress plus rest, divided by awareness, equals energy:

Stress is an unavoidable part of life that we need to thrive. However, we don’t have unlimited capacity for stress and if you’re not getting enough rest then you might find that your tolerance for challenging situations can go down (like growing a whole new human!). Unfortunately humans aren’t always very good at resting. Every day we’re bombarded with messages (outside noise) that tell us rest is for wimps, so we’re not always tuned into what our bodies and minds might needs, or if we are we might choose not to listen to those messages. I know that throughout my pregnancy I’ve felt pressure to ‘keep going’ as I’ve absorbed all the messages about how ‘pregnancy is not an illness’ and ideas about how I should just be able to plough on with normal life, bump in tow.

If you don’t rest you can compound the negative effects of stress and it becomes even more stressful as you feel like you ‘can’t’ do something because you’re burnt out. It can become a vicious cycle. So hear me clearly when I say REST IS NOT A LUXURY, it’s a necessary part of the human experience, especially when you are doing something as monumental as growing a new person!

Finding More Energy During Pregnancy

While pregnancy might make you feel more tired than you have every felt in your entire life, there are a few simple things you can do to help manage your energy during this challenging time…

• take it easy - I know this sounds like a cliche, but now is the time to prioritise rest and sleep. It’s only for a few months and people will understand if a trip to the pub feels like a bit too much.

• ask for help - another one that can be easier said than done, but drop the ego and ask for help if you need it. People are always more willing than you think they’ll be and it will make life less stressful for you.

• go to bed earlier - since becoming pregnant 8.30/9pm has become my normal bed time. I honestly just can’t deal with the idea of staying awake any longer and there’s no shame in hitting the sheets early.

• eat well - all the extra demands on your body mean it’s more important than ever to make sure your diet is nutrient rich and you’re getting enough calories. This might be easier said than done if you’re struggling with sickness, but try to eat little and often if you can.

• get moving - it always sounds counter intuitive, but getting outside for some fresh air and a bit of exercise can be a real energy booster. Even a short walk around the park counts.